You never know when it will hit you…

One of my most vivid memories of my mom is from December 8, 1980 – the day John Lennon was shot. She was sitting at our round table, crying. I didn’t understand why, so much, but I knew enough about the Beatles and had listened to enough John Lennon to get it.

Imagine was one of her favorite songs, guaranteed to make her weepy – she was a crier. So am I. One more thing passed down the matrilineal line.

When she was dying my sister and I played music for her. My iPhone right next to her on the pillow. Imagine came on just as she drew her last breath.

This morning on the way to work NPR was talking about the death of Lennon, 30 years ago today, and of course Imagine was the lead music. Bam! Tears welled up, emotions rose, and the whole day shifted.

Not in a bad way,just a shift. Another reminder of how things change in the blink of an eye (I know it is a cliche, but that’s really how fast it can happen), the beat of a hummingbird’s wing.

Another reminder that this breath, this moment is all we have.

Tomorrow is the first birthday my mom won’t be with me.

Deep breaths,
Jessica

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